That is not a dumb question... in fact Jesus teaches the opposite in a couple places. Jesus teaches that 'not everyone who says, "lord, lord will enter the kingdom'" (Matthew 7:21). He teaches that some will say to him, "'we ate and drank with you, and you taught in our streets.' But he will reply, 'I don't know you or where you come from. Away from me, all you evil doers'" (Luke 13:26-27). Or he says, "many will say to me on that day, 'Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in your name, and in your name drive out demons and perform many miracles?' Then I will tell them plainly, 'I never knew you. Away from me, you evil doers!'"(Matthew 7:22-23). So, Jesus is informing us that there will be people that assume, and wrongly, that they 'know him' and it will come as an utterly crushing blow that they not only are not known by the Christ but also that they are 'evil doers!'
So, asking if we are real is a good question that we should put to ourselves because the bible puts it to us as well; "Examine yourselves to see whether you are in the faith; test yourselves. Do you not realize that Christ Jesus is in you- unless, of course, you fail the test?" (2 Cor 13:5) This is a good question to ask and I think it is a much better idea to question now then to find out on the day of judgement. If you haven't asked then maybe it would be a good idea... 'Am I real? Am I really saved?'
I think it is incredibly mature to ask that question as a high school student... I know I didn't personally ask that question until I was much older... Having grown up in churches I just assumed that I knew about grace. When in fact the exact opposite was true. I knew of cheap grace, not the costly grace that the bible speaks of. The problem of most false converts is cheap grace. Dietrich Bonhoeffer says it this way: "Cheap grace is the deadly enemy of our Church [and individuals]. We are fighting today for costly grace" (The Cost of Discipleship, pg. 43). Cheap grace teaches that forgiveness is cheap and easy. Which is the exact opposite from the cross. The cross was costly. Grace is far from cheap. That is why it is so magnificent for the saved sinner! We dwell at the foot of the cross in wonder and awe. We revel at what was accomplished for us! We are astonished at the grace and mercy that God extends to us. That the Son of God would die for me?! Who could possibly think that the King of the universe would die for a rebel like me? We are humbled as we contemplate the glory of cross, It is the power of God and the wisdom of GOD!!!! It is our hope and our salvation! It is beautiful! But now I am getting ahead of myself...
Here is a way that you can have some confidence in God's saving of you specifically. You probably already know that Christ literally died, that he absorbed the wrath of God due to sinners, that he took on himself the curse of sin and death, that he was buried, and that he resurrected to authenticate his ability to conquer death, the grave, and sin. And, he extends the offer to any that would believe on him for salvation. What the question really is, "did he do that for me?" Let me ask you this; "how do you feel about the cross?" The answer will help you to know whether or not you are saved. "For the message of the cross is foolishness to those who are perishing, but to us who are being saved it is the power of God... [the message of] Christ crucified is a stumbling block to Jews and foolishness to Gentiles, but those whom God has called, both Jews and Greeks, Christ the power of God and the wisdom of God" (1 Cor 1:18, 23-24). When you think about what the cross means to you do you see salvation? Do you see glory? Do you see forgiveness? Are the scars on Christ balm for your soul? Do you see that your punishment was satisfied in the torture, abandonment, ridicule, and destitute of the Son of God when he walked the brutal road to Calvary and hung on the cross?
When you see the magnificence of The Author of Love dying on a cursed tree you know that you are saved! There is a miracle that happens when you are saved. The technical term is regeneration, or you may have heard the phrase, 'born again.' What that means is that God does a miracle in your heart and life. The bible tells us that we are dead in our sin and we are opposed to the ways of God. We think the Cross is dumb and obedience is legalistic. Then in His great love and mercy He makes us ALIVE! He gives us the ability to see the beauty of Christ and what He achieved. We get to see 'the light of the gospel of the glory of Christ, who is the image of God" (2 Cor 4:4). That, my friends, is a beautiful miracle. When Christ who is the image of God is revealed to you and you feel your heart skip a beat. When you feel adoration for the risen Christ rising up in you then you know that you have been brought from death to life. You can say, "I once was blind but now I see!"
Unfortunately, those that are perishing think of the cross as foolishness and some even think of Christ as their little dispenser of cheap grace that 'justifies the sin and not the sinner' (Bonhoeffer, The Cost of Discipleship, pg. 43). I suppose that if you feel that way then you have much to be concerned about. However, God appeals to you to fly to the cross; to trust his Son for salvation; to accept forgiveness of sins; to be brought from death to life. The offer is made today for those that are far off. And I personally beg you to do the same; trust Christ, believe on Him for salvation, He is extending His grace to you today! Do not stiff arm His grace again! Please please please allow Him access to your heart and life!
And for those of us that need to be reminded of his love for us and his saving power:
"God demonstrates his own love for us in this; While we were still sinners, Christ died for us. Since we have now been justified by his blood, how much more shall we be saved from God's wrath through him! For if when we were God's enemies, we were reconciled to him through the death of his Son, how much more, having been reconciled, shall we be saved through his life! Not only is this so, but we also rejoice in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have now received reconciliation" (Romans 5:8-11).
As those that are saved by grace we still make mistakes and in a weird way, although I hate the mistakes, I am thankful for them. They keep me near his cross. Christians that don't need a savior are the ones you have to be worried for. Their ability to perform their Christian duties repel them from Christ and from his cross. They will make it to the bitter end on their own strength and hear those treacherous words, 'I never knew you, you might have done all sorts of things in my Name but you did not know me.' Christ's offer is for those of us that sit at the foot of his cross daily and receive salvation daily. We are utterly reliant on him for forgiveness and sanctification and life. When you find yourself at Calvary you say with Peter, "Lord, to whom shall we go? You have the words of eternal life. We believe and know that you are the Holy One of God" (John 6: 68). Salvation is from the Lord and he grants assurance to those that sit at the feet of Jesus for eternal life.
But I know sometimes there is only a little flicker in your heart. You barely feel anything towards Christ. You are feeling weighed down and, truthfully, disinterested in Christ or His Cross
And at the end of the day maybe the best advise I can give to someone asking these questions is... go to God. Confess that your appreciation of the Christ is not what it should be. Ask Him if the offer He made is for you. I think it is fair to ask Him if He loves you. I believe that God is more than able and willing to demonstrate His love for you. He will wrap you up in His arms of grace and show you, "you are my son," or "you are my daughter." And there is nothing more precious than that feeling. And the more you feel and experience that love the more your love for Him grows. And the more that exchange of love goes back and forth between you and your Maker the more you can be assured that you are His, and He is yours.
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